Feelings of being broken and dirty, due to abuse, both lend themselves to a desire to hide away in isolation. Survivors can feel as if other people are able to tell what has happened to them by the way they look and their demeanor. We become paranoid of social judgment and physical danger.

Perpetrators seek to prevent their victims from socializing, to block them from being able to escape or ask for help. We’ve learned that it is safer to keep to ourselves, and be alone, than to be with others.

You deserve to reclaim your right to choose whether to be alone or to socialize with other people. It is healthy to have a balance of the two, time to self-nurture and time to be nurtured and share with others.


  • Make 2 separate appointments in your calendar for the coming week:
    • One for an activity you enjoy doing alone.
    • The second for an activity you enjoy doing with friends or family.
      • Contact a friend or family member to invite them to do the activity with you.

Affirmation: I maintain a healthy balance of alone time and social interaction.

Journal Cue: Write down 10 things you enjoy doing by yourself. Write down 10 things you enjoy doing with others.

© Amanda Lee