The world seems to spin faster on some days than on others. We can easily feel caught up in the speed with which other people live their lives, especially when those people judge how we live ours. Being dictated to by an abuser about how fast something should be done, or how often, is demoralizing. We are placed in a position of constant failure. This influence can lead us into living in recurring burn-out cycles; pushing ourselves too hard to do things “perfectly,” and then judging ourselves for our inevitable collapse.

There is an undiscovered tempo inside of you waiting to be experienced, a gentle cadence of “doing-ness.” Today, you have the right to self-regulate your life with self-compassion as your guide, rather than being a cog in someone else’s machine.


  • Grab paper and pen and find a comfortable place to sit.
  • Set a timer for 15 minutes.
  • During that time write a list of things you feel you “have to do.” For example: personal hygiene tasks, household chores, work and family responsibilities, etc.
  • Restart the timer for 15 minutes.
  • Write the words, “Thank you for,” in front of each of the items on your list.
  • Next, pick 5 personal and domestic chores from your list.
    • Write about how often you think you should do them vs. how often you would prefer to do them for your self-care at a healthy tempo.
  • Schedule them into your calendar based on your self-care pace.

Affirmation: My pace is my own. I change my pace to suit my well-being.

Journal Cue: Write an example of when you felt someone else pressure you to work faster and do more than was healthy for you. Write about how it feels for you to change the pace of your life to suit your well-being?

© Amanda Lee